Monday, May 28, 2007

Zo-lofty thinking

I am reaching zo-lofty heights.

On May 14th I saw my surfer-dude doc and started on zoloft.

Today is May 28, and I am feeling so much more alive than I was only two weeks ago. That's pretty cool - better living through modern chemistry, no irony intended.

Think of all the people you've read about who suffered from "melancholia" and had no way out. They had to drag themselves through one long black day after another.

Around 400 BC Hippocrates described "all fears and despondencies, if they last a long time...." as being symptoms of melancholia. That's a good description. This time it was the fear that got my attention.

And so, zoloft. The first week was grim but I had the hope of knowing the zoloft would kick in sooner or later. During the second week I felt fear, but less often, less chronically. Today I am feeling pretty good. Able to complete tasks, multi-task from time to time, don't feel as stupid or as useless as I felt only two weeks ago.

I think of the people I see who are obviously ill, living on the streets. (See Zoot's post on passport-hunting for a good description.) How horrible! I cannot imagine dragging myself day after day through such a terrifying and bleak existence.

But enough of that for now. The tree in my backyard is producing fresh green shoots. The trade winds are blowing. The pool sweep is working its little heart out keeping the water clean. There is a heron standing on the pool deck eyeing the pool sweep. The first game of the Stanley Cup will start in an hour and a half. Life doesn't get much better than this.

6 comments:

Creatific said...

Glad you are feeling better. I hope the heron eventually thought better of going after the pool sweep, whatever the heron's intentions!

Zootenany Hoodlum said...

What a perfect picture.

thinking...thinking...thinking said...

Creatific - his intentions were not honorable, I think, but the poolsweep is intact. I checked.

fiona-h said...

it doesn't, does it ??

:-)

Anonymous said...

I'm glad the Z is working for you. It definitely lifted me out of the pit but the price was a kind of frontal lobe deficit. Specifically I could no longer enjoy jazz or classical music. They lost the power to move me emotionally and jazz especially was just so much noise. I acquired a taste for my teenager's pop tunes.

fiona-h said...

losing one's taste for jazz is no loss, if you ask me